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Skittles are evil

I wanted to share my story of survival in hopes that no one else will fall victim to the evilness of the skittles..

Above is what the evidence bag looks like from the crime scene..

Below is the culprit

Here is my story –

It was a long time ago.. when I was young and pretty.. wait.. just young. An innocent working in a call center doing what I did best then, answering calls and giving the best customer service I could while on my desk lay the evil incarnate… a plastic container of mint skittles..

in between calls.. I would sacrifice a few to the greater good .. for my breath of course

when suddenly I beheld the evil skittle.. and not knowing any better proceeded to consume it or tried to when it suddenly and viciously attacked me refusing to go the way of its siblings..

so I try to drink something to wash it down

it laughed evilly at my efforts

I tried to send some of its siblings to convince it to go in peace

it went..

or so I thought

until I got a phone call

and that was when the little skittle decided to mess with me

by jumping down the wrong pipe

and causing me to breathe minty fresh goodness..

but I couldn’t breathe (and breathing is essential)

so I ended up getting a ride in my managers camero (it was red)

and going to the er..

(for being choked by a skittle)

and while I’m inhaling and breathing minty goodness… the doctor comes in.. and i try to explain the evil skittle that tried to choke me..

he turns his head and asks..

what’s a skittle?


I’m not sure what expression was on my face when he said that.. but it had to be priceless as I tried to explain that a skittle was about the size of an M&M but this one had a minty filling..

he cackled evilly and decided to give me a muscle relaxer and send me on my way

and my manager drove me back to work

and I sat back down at my desk

still confused about what happened exactly

looked at the container of half eaten mint skittles

handed them to a co-worker

I swore I heard giggling coming from the container

and eyes dilated and the world very slow and a bit fuzzy I tried to give customer service to the best of my ability

drugged or not..

Let this be a warning to all to take care when eating skittles… there may be a rogue skittle in the pack that wants to kill you.

Don’t let it.. open the bag and tell it who is boss.

Don’t let a candy control your day.


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